Buff my scrotum: More child wisdom: love, marriage, dating....

Thursday, August 30, 2007

You know what I think about this love and marriage nonsense. Let's see what real kids had to say (quotes are actual):

Love and Marriage:

"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long." -- Glenn, age 7
"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." -- Mike, 10
"Most men are brainless, so you might have to try more than once to find a live one." -- Angie, age 10
"A man and a woman promise to go through sickness and illness and diseases together." -- Marlon, age 10

How to tell if two people are married:

"You might have to guess based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids." -- Derrick, age 8

Deciding who to marry:

"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming." -- Allan, age 10

What to do when a first date ends badly:

"I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns." -- Craig, age 9

Titles of love songs you can sing to your beloved:

"'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.'" -- Larry, age 8
"'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?'" -- Arnold, age 10
"'I Am In Love With You Most of the Time, But Don't Bother Me When I'm With My Friends.'" -- Bob, age 9

At 11:10 AM, Deech said...: "The Preacher asked her, and she said, 'I do'"
"The Preacher asked me, she said, 'He does too'"
"The Preacher said, 'I pronounce you 99 to life. Son she's no lady, she's your wife'"

-courtesy of Lyle Lovette from his album "Pontiac"

Flyinfox_SATX
At 7:01 PM, Twit said...: "On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." -- Mike, 10

-Classic Machiavellian Response
At 8:33 PM, Infantry Dad said...: Allans got it.
Keep the chips and dip comming.

Oh yeah and the beer.
And be ready for a quickie at half time, or the seventh inning stretch.
At 11:39 AM, La Sirena said...: When I sold beer at the ball park, the 7th Inning stretch was always when we got off.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!
At 10:05 AM, Infantry Dad said...: Isn't getting off the purpose of a quickie?
Maybe I've had it all wrong?

Damn!

hehehehehehehehehehehehehhehe!!
At 4:20 AM, doctor chip said...: "'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?'"

yup.

class unsurpassed.

"jqbqkh"

B-)

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