Steve Irwin and endangered species
Poor old Steve-o's gone toes up. Crikey. Since everyone else is doing a tribute cum obituary in his honor, Buff My Scrotum™ brings you comments now from two of the wisest men who've ever lived, Derek & Clive, herewith offering up thoughts on endangered species:CLIVE:..... But, er, still, if it's an endangered species, I say fuck 'em.
DEREK: Right.
CLIVE: I'd like to see every endangered species wiped off the fucking face of the Earth.
DEREK: Yeah.
CLIVE: People go, they're all moaning on, they say whales are more intelligent than human beings.
DEREK: Yeah.
CLIVE: Are they? Do you think whales and dolphins are more intelligent than human beings?
DEREK: Oh yeah.
CLIVE: Why?
DEREK: Says so.
CLIVE: Yeah, but they're not. Whales are fucking stupid. Can you mention one whale in the history of mankind that has had a record in the top ten? Can you? Can you mention one whale who's written the equivalent of, er, 'Othello', Shakespeare, 'Health & Efficiency'? They've produced nothing in the way of literature. All they've fucking produced is a load of other whales and all they eat is fucking plankton, and they call them intelligent. Can you imagine drifting along in the sea with your mouth open and a lot of fucking plankton going in?
DEREK: Yeah, I can imagine that.
CLIVE: You'd like it, would you, just drifting around in the sea? And you can't-, they're such cunts they can't even breathe underwater. They have to keep coming up the whole fucking time and spouting. Then some cunt comes on telly and he says, "Oh, the whale is being wiped out by mankind, save the fucking whales." Well! During the war, did we notice a lot of whales w-, rallying round and saying, "Save England!" I didn't notice many down my part of the world.
DEREK: Oh, fucking-
CLIVE: I didn't see whales coming up with Union Jacks saying, "We'll fight the Boche". No, they were doing fucking all .....
DEREK: No, 'cause they .....
CLIVE: ..... swimming around the fucking sea sucking fucking plankton down!
posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 12:10 PM
3 Comments:
"two of the wisest men who've ever lived": see dictionary.com, under "sarcasm"....!
Oh, I know what sarcasm means. Thank You for the sugggestion to look it up, though. Very Helpful. It was merely the way you were going around quoting them to beat the band. All thinly veiled-like. I was getting a head of myself, is all.
if only I could give myself head...
B-\
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