Light and hearty observations from a fat and ugly guy. Home of hackneyed drivel and ersatz-existentialist effluence. Choleric biliousness a specialty, since 1958.

Immigration hoo-hah: missing the point!

With all the yip-yap about Jose wanting "equal rights" and Maricon demanding fast-tracked green cards and Flore stomping her pretty little Latina foot about citizenship and Sean Hannity whining about border security and on and on and on....the most important part of the debate has been obscured.

That is--tits.

I posit the following: who cares where they come from, so long as they're all fluffy and squeezably soft? You can't tell who's what race anyway...I bet. Want proof? Check the photos below (betcha can't eat just one!). On display you'll find:

1. True-blue-wankably-wonderful-American Denise Richards' rack;
2. Mexican go-rubber-at-the-knees-she's-so-hot Salma Hayek's ta-tas;
3. Koreans-are-all-insane-and-will-kill-you-for-kimchi-but-good-God-
almighty-just-once before-I-die-please-please-please-I-beg-you-Sung
Hi Lee's fun bags.

BUT--not necessarily in that order. So, stare long and, um, hard, and then try to figure out who's who:

If you guessed the order as Salma-Sung Hi-Denise, you qualify as President of the Perv Patrol. Nice going, soldier.

And admit it. You'd kill to play tube steak tango with either of the specimens so crassly featured here, irrespective of their citizenship status. Right? So, for those concerned about illegal immigration, I say: exercise the cleavage caveat! Titties trump transgressions! Mind the mammary mandate! And since you can't tell whose babe's boobs are whose and if they look like this --I say, get right to the head of the welcome to the U-S-of-A line!

And while you're at it, buff my scrotum.

posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 8:24 AM