Light and hearty observations from a fat and ugly guy. Home of hackneyed drivel and ersatz-existentialist effluence. Choleric biliousness a specialty, since 1958.

Expedition to McDonald's

Last night whilst driving home drunk, I thought: I'm a bit peckish. McDonald's, here I come. In the drive-thru, then, behind this behemoth SUV. A Ford Expedition, containing a mother and a simply incredible number of teenagers. And they were giving me shit, and I wasn't happy about it.

First off, they ordered at least one of each of everything on the damn menu, but with variations, dontcha know. A Big Mac but with no lettuce, for example. Second, this took forever. So me being me, I start yelling at them. Out the window, looking forward and pointing with my middle finger. I'm screaming at the driver, calling her a fat twat and a warm bowl of fuck and the like.

Defeated, she drive off. And my double quarter pounder with cheese and extra cholesterol tasted extra good after this vigorous exchange, let me tell you.

posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 3:41 PM