Light and hearty observations from a fat and ugly guy. Home of hackneyed drivel and ersatz-existentialist effluence. Choleric biliousness a specialty, since 1958.

Tonight's debate

Am sitting here breathless, awaiting the great VP debate. Here's my take, advance of the activity--you may well disagree, and that's fine, but buff my scrotum regardless:

Sarah Palin. Look, I know more about just about everything that she's gonna be asked, and without the need for prepping, preening, and practice. It's simple: Pakistan--fuck 'em. India figured these Mohammedites years ago, and to their credit, have been able to keep 'em down, irrespective of Kashmir and the curry they slurp up endlessly. Their gods have way too many arms and legs, and they burp and wipe their butts with their hands. Enough said. Next: Afghanistan--fuck them, too. They can't figure out electricity. I say, wipe them all off the face of the earth, quick-like, and let's be done with them. Plus their president, Karzai, can't figure out how to wear a fucking overcoat: earth to Karzai, the arms go IN the arms of the coat. You're not Robert Mitchum, so there's no point wearing the damn thing over your shoulders. OK? The economy--who knows?

Plus, Sarah is way better looking than Joe, and that has to count for something.

Joe Biden. Experience, combined with hair plugs. A killer combination. I say, Joe, open up with some rousing speech delivered previously by someone else. How about: "We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be,we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender..." ok, maybe not, considering that was Winston Churchill's thingy about the fucking Germans back in 1942, but since you have a history of ripping off others word-for-word, let's make it good, ok?

Seriously, Joe needs to not be nasty or condescending, and just let Sarah swill in her own shit, which based on the Katie Couric interview of this week, she'll have no problem doing.

Should be fun, boyos and girlos. Can't wait to recap for you, Nigel style, which I shall do as soon as the debate be done!

posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 8:04 PM