Coors can buff my scrotum: when the mountains turn blue
Just how dumb do the beer makers think we are? Apparently, off the charts.There's the normal stupid TV advertising for Budweiser, Miller, etc., with 30 second mini-stories about how you drink their brands and automatically gorgeous women will flock to you ( more likely, you'll end up a fat sloppy drunk with a massive beer gut).
But lately we've been subjected to Coors ads where 20-somethings are "interviewing" football coaches in press conferences. The point of the ads seems to be: when the mountains on the label turn blue, the beer is cold.It's not enough that you've already got it in a fridge or a cooler or on ice. No. Even if you do, apparently you're supposed to ignore this and wait until the mountains on the label turn blue. Then it's ok to drink. Not before that, mind you, so hold your horses and wait.
Wait for it....wait....wait...damn, I'm thirsty for this Rocky Mountain swill but I'm waiting as per the instructions from Bill Parcells in the TV ad, goddammit, waiting, waiting.....waiting. Now it's light blue. Does that mean it's cool, but not cold? WAIT. Waiting, waiting, waiting.....waiting. Now, finally, the piss mountain label thingy is blue, so I can drink my Coors with complete confidence.If you've got an old six pack with the original yellow Coors label and no goddamm mountains on it, well, you're SOL and can never drink it.
We're all idiots, apparently, and Peter Coors and his entire family can buff my scrotum.
posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 2:39 PM
84 Comments:
The new coors sucks anyway.
Tinny flavor, and it gives me a headache.
If I'm going to get a headache I want the beer to taste good.
Like Ballentine Ale XxX.
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best light beer i have tried. get past the marketing. it is a good beer.
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