Happy St. Patrick's Day, shlubbies!
In honor of St. Patricks' Day, my best wishes and felicitations, and as is said affectionately throughout the "Auld Sod" on this day: "Téigh trasna ort féin". This well-used and much appreciated Irish-Gaelic phrase, translated, means: "Go and fuck yourself".Seriously, though, the Irish are great. My paternal great grandmother was Irish and it was from her I inherited my prediliction for consumption of vast amounts of alcohol. So there's a soft place in my heart (and what's left of my liver) for Ireland and all things Irish. I'm even shitting green today.
A couple of posts back, I republished an excerpt from P.J. O'Rourke's masterpiece, Foreigners Around The World. Being today is what today is, I thought it only appropriate to find his entry re: Irish, and put it up for all to enjoy. And I do this with love. Really.
IrishPie-faced, bandy legged sots who almost never fuck. Ignorant and superstitious, they are in the utter thrall to the vile, conniving priests of their dark and barbarous religion. Their women have their legs on upside down and no man in the country eats anything but potatoes, and only eats them when he is out of strong drink. The principle delights of the Irish are in quarelling and fighting and killing each other with bombs. They can be trained to do nothing useful that a dray horse can't accomplish in half the time, and they spew out a continuous stream of mumbles and grunts which they fancy to be "poems". The sell their children for whiskey.
Good points
Many Irish are dead.
Proper forms of address
Bogmouth, peat-face, Mr. Potato Head, nun-buns, dumb Mick.
There you have it, shlubbies. Drink up, eat corned beef and cabbage, and for all you lovely ladies out there, do me a favor: erin go braless.
posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 6:44 AM
5 Comments:
...And may the luck of the Irish be with you always as you, like all of us, search for the elusive pot of gold at the end of every rainbow!
...I am just happy with Green Beer.
Flyinfox_SATX
Happy St.Patty's Day to you as well
May you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows you're dead.
In life, there are only two things to worry about — Either you are well or you are sick.
If you are well, there is nothing to worry about, But if you are sick, there are only two things to worry about — Either you will get well or you will die.
If you get well, there is nothing to worry about, But if you die, there are only two things to worry about — Either you will go to heaven or hell.
If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about.
And if you go to hell, you’ll be so busy shaking hands with all your friends You won’t have time to worry!
Ain't that the truth! ;-)
I love corned beef and cabbage.
I totally missed St.Patty's Day this year!
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