Sunday, March 16, 2008

Pearle Vision goes Biblical

Nothing to do last night so I'm watching a movie set in about 300 A.D. -- lottsa blood and gore. Sword fighting, etc. But it got me thinking: apparently everyone back then had perfect vision. Plus, they never needed sun glasses! No eye-wear in sight, anywhere, throughout the movie.

So I thought, how would it be if we got real here? Take for example, The Last Temptation Of Christ. Here's a still from the movie, with the luscious Barbara Hershey as Mary Magdalene, Willem Dafoe as Jesus, and Harvey Keitel as Judas:


So what if poor Mary was nearsighted, Jesus was into extreme sports, and Judas fancied himself one cool dude and wanted prescription wraparounds? Mighta looked like this:
Kind of changes the whole feeling of the thing, eh?

2 Comments:

At 7:50 PM, Blogger Carlos said...

I wonder if the Romans would've been so cavalier as to crucify a dude into extreme sports.

 
At 8:36 PM, Blogger Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines said...

Damn good question, well asked. Because it WAS the Romans who did the deed. Us Hebrews have taken it up the poop shoot on that one for 2,000 years, undeservedly. Blame Pilate and Caesar.

That being said, Jesus was a cool dude deserving of ultra-shades, if you closely read the New Testament, having little time for the likes of the TV evangelist types we see today; demanding help for the poor and forgiveness for hookers and tax collectors and the like. I wonder if he was wandering around today, how people would react to him. Perhaps the same reaction as the Branch Davidians in Waco in 1993? Who knows?

 

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