Light and hearty observations from a fat and ugly guy. Home of hackneyed drivel and ersatz-existentialist effluence. Choleric biliousness a specialty, since 1958.

Fat chicks leaving Singapore

E-mail, I get e-mail, most of it condescending and snide. I love it. Like today, when I was challenged by...I don't know, The Fat Disgusting Women Traveler's Association? Yesterday's post about traveling Singapore Airlines and always enplaning encamped next to Shamu, The Killer Whale, apparently set off alarm bells at TFDWTA.

Mais, moi, j'ai la preuve, above right. This photo from the Straits Times archive shows the fatty hippo lard-belly darlings doing the pre-departure nude perp walk at Changi airport. In order to clear required outbound immigration, these el-gordo corpulent greasepack porkers are escorted to a special area in the bowels of the airport, thence to an examination room, fully nude God help us, where their fat rolls are lifted up and out so as to be sure no heroin, cocaine, or even donuts are leaving lovely Majulah Singapura. Illegally. Once they clear, they can leave forthwith, and naturally and invariably end up squatting next to me on the bloody plane.

I have to say, though: that old benevolent dictator Lee Kuan Yew doesn't screw around. Here's the country's pledge:

We, the citizens of Singapore, pledge ourselves as one united people, regardless of race, language or religion, to build a democratic society based on justice and equality so as to achieve happiness, prosperity and progress for our nation.

Also, to make goddamm sure that
no disgusting fat obese foreign twats
leave our lovely country
without first having their
fat rolls lifted up, out, and examined.

Amen.

posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 8:18 PM