Light and hearty observations from a fat and ugly guy. Home of hackneyed drivel and ersatz-existentialist effluence. Choleric biliousness a specialty, since 1958.

Quarter cutie cooked, quartered. Where was Mickey Rourke?

See the story about the guy in New Orleans' French Quarter who decapitated and dismembered his girlfriend, boiled her head up on the GE stovetop and cooked the rest of her in the oven--then, jumped off a 5 storey building to his death?

Undoubtedly the dude was influenced by "evil spirits". After all, they lived above a voodoo shop ("We've got curses on sale, 2 for 1, this weekend only--come on down").

Made me think of the Mickey Rourke film Angel Heart, which happened to be set in the New Orleans French Quarter. This is the second Mickey Rourke film in my soon-to-be-famous Hot Chicks/Bad Flicks Film Festival. From my standpoint, it's notable primarily because Lisa Bonet (the super sexy daughter from the Cosby Show in the 80's--photo above left) is totally and completely naked for much of the film and, particularly at the end, gives a simply smashing performance on her back, writhing, legs wrapped around this Rourke as he, um, Bonets her. The rest of the film had some French Quarter dismemberment in it...hearts being taken out of bodies, blood everywhere, etc. I couldn't really figure out what the hell was going on but I didn't mostly care because of the enthusiastic performance of Ms. Bonet, bed-wise. In terms of her walking and talking and moving around and acting in general, I'd say she did just ok, but she was frigging fantastic and oh so Oscar worthy whilst said frigging was taking place. So on the "How Many Dead Hippos Did It Blow?" scale, this film rates 9 Dead Hippo blow jobs.

posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 8:33 AM