Light and hearty observations from a fat and ugly guy. Home of hackneyed drivel and ersatz-existentialist effluence. Choleric biliousness a specialty, since 1958.

Turn thy head, and expectorate

Prostate exam humor. Real comments from patients, allegedly collected by a proctologist during the, er, probing:

• "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before..."
• "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
• "Can you hear me NOW?"
• "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."
• "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
• "Well, now I know how a Muppet feels."
• "God, now I know why I am not gay."
• "Can you retrieve my eyeball while you're in there? Maybe then I can stop having a shitty outlook on life."
  

And the best one of all..

• "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head isn't up there?"

posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 12:36 PM