Wherein you Nigel assays clean thinking and talking
Welcome, dearest friends and funseekers! I am going to try something today that's new and different. Ready?I have a friend who's some kind of conjurer...I dunno, maybe a Buddhist mystic? Which is hard to be here in suburban Atlanta. What's to be mystical about? The traffic? But there's real power here, with this woman: some chanting, magic spells, potions, and lo and behold for the first time in over a year, I've slept two nights in a row straight through until it was time to get up. Normally, I get about 4 hours of sleep a night and am exhausted all the time. But, apparently, courtesy of this female version of David Copperfield and her long distance hocus pocus, I can slip into the arms of Morpheus and STAY THERE!
Anyhow, she is disturbed by my continual swearing, both in person, and on this blog. Something about "karma", which I believe is a brand of laundry soap? I'm so confused. Nevertheless, and based on her continual expressions of concern, I am endeavoring to go straight vis a vis the cursing, and especially vis a vis the blasphemy. At least for today. I will break the habit. For 24 hours. Maybe.This is difficult for me, as there are two things I am famous for: swearing, and pretty much non-stop continual wanking. Polishing the helmet on my German soldier. Talking on the clone phone. Frightening Uncle Fester. Field stripping my M-16. Squashing Stonehenge. You get the picture?
I'm so horny, the crack of dawn better watch out. I mean, a stiff breeze comes a long and blamo, I'm at it, a humpin' and a pumpin'. So long as I don't have to stop doing THAT, well, then, I'll give this clean talking nonsense a shot.
Pray for me, shlubbies. I'm irredeemable, I'm afraid. But if I succeed, I'll be the first to celebrate with a toast: champagne for my real friends, and real pain for my sham friends!! Amen.
posted by Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines @ 7:38 AM
6 Comments:
I've never tried to stop cussing for more than a few seconds. Even when I'm alone I think in profanity.
Good luck with your fast..
clone phone !! LOL !!!
will be thinking clean thoughts for you...
Nigel! My prayers are with you! I think you can do it!
Why yes, dearest, I am in complete agreement. I MIGHT be able to stop cursing, but give up masturbation ? Never !
Glad you got 2 good night's sleep - whatever she suggests, keep trying it :)
i agree with this mystic in which you speak!! Miss Katie does not like the cursing either. i am trying to get my wiener to stop referring to everyone as "beeotch".
but it's gonna take some time!!
Profanity is the duct tape and bailing wire of language. Don't stop using it - use it wisely, sparingly and appropriately.
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